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Wednesday, January 31

Holly smokes, Penny Arcade is DOWN?!? Yikezaroo!

Gosh, it's 5pm and I just WOKE up, this is not good, nooooo, not good at all.


4:59 PM | Jus | # | no comments

wow, the world must be coming to an end, something must be wrong with the earth's gravitational pull, powazek wrote me back?!?! okay so it's 3 lines, but ohmigod, he actually hit reply and then send... must've been a slow day in powazek-land, okay sorry, I couldn't resist that one. thing is, I read one of his old essay type things, and it was good, inspired even, so I told him so, and low and behold { d m p } graces my inbox. I'm still in awe of the guy, because I've got to remember, he's still just a guy, and I know I don't reply to every e-mail I get, so I should cut him some slack and stop making a big deal outta this, okay fine, I'll stop. I'll leave it with a, "cool" and that's that, happy? you damn bastards.

anything else? well I've got work upon work to do, and I know I'll leave it all for the last minute as always. why oh why, am I so stupid. I got a 20GB external hard drive, slow as FUCK, but I need the space, and my cd-writer is still refusing to burn a disc, so YES I'm sending it back... when I have the time... which means when James gets around to doing it for me. I also ordered RAM, so I'll be up to about 192mb in a little while, now all I have to do is re-format this drive and it's showtime.

oh... did I mention the little additions? no? oh well...


3:00 AM | Jus | # | no comments

Tuesday, January 30

I hate the fact that I can’t write like you people, like Stac, or Powazek, or Brown, or that guy over at plasticbag.org. I mean, writing for me, happens at 3 in the morning when I’m either depressed/hyper/eratic/orevenmoredepressed, these guys write every day, all the time, they keep journals and books upon books, they jot down something here, scribble something there, it’s a constant flow of ideas and thoughts, a flow I could never really get started. Mine’s more of a sputter, and you never know when it’s gonna gag. *Sigh* good thing is, I’m glad they’re there, because they show me a little of what it means to be great, talented writers who say much more than the words allow. I’m good with a pencil, but I also want to be good at stringing together my thoughts, as well as one of my characters, so I’m going to try, a little harder, just a tad, at doing something else I love, because I’ve been neglecting it for far too long. Smile and wish me luck damn you.

11:31 AM | Jus | # | no comments

Sunday, January 28

I found this at Skye, it's an excerpt from one of her poems/writings called "thing":

i don't want to live,
i just want to take a bunch of photographs,
and look as though i'm living.


I just felt somehow connected to that paragraph, like I can relate, at one point it time... I hope nothing ever happens to her site, but go visit anyway.


3:39 PM | Jus | # | no comments


Feeling a little better.

Now for the downer:

Damn, I hate the feeling that you're wasting someone else's hard earned money, I mean, we've all heard it, we've all probably dismissed them as being old and too dramatic. But damn, when you really think about it, it gives you that sick feeling in your stomach, that stays with you, when the fuck will I ever be able to amass ANY kind of cash... argh, I don't much like the process of getting my degree, and the prospect of working full time is as scaryenough thati'mgoingtoshotmyselfinthehead as it might have "fun" and proud moments, plus that paycheck'll sure do wonders for you...

Anyway, I respect my parents, especially my Dad, even though he IS a pain, and I'm going to try not to squander the little cash he did put aside for my ungrateful ass, I just wish he wouldn't keep banging me over the head with it...

*ouch*


2:22 AM | Jus | # | no comments

Saturday, January 27

Someone, anyone, take my father, please, PLEASE.

I can't even sleep in my own room 'cuz the snoring drives nails into my ears, I can't LEAVE THE HOUSE either, it's a NO WIN situation, oh god, going insane... going insane...


4:13 AM | Jus | # | no comments

Thursday, January 25

PAPER FIGHT! Hahaha, ah yes, the one lively thing in the whole class, it was like the arrows in braveheart, as soon as the witch turned her back, "FWOOSH!" a barrage of crumpled paper hit the air, this is what school's all about.

*cough*


9:36 PM | Jus | # | no comments

Wednesday, January 24

Okay the verdict is in, I've got acute bronchitis, they also thought I might've had pneumonia so I got a chest extra, turned out none of that though, *deep sigh of relief*

What's fucked up is that I've had this bloody cough for MONTHS, most of you know exactly how long, and say stuff like, "you STILL have that cough man?!" Yes, I still have that cough, man.

Hopefully the anti-biotics will kill it once and for all, I know the god damn cough medicine they prescribed to supress the cough isn't working ONE bloody bit.

Anything else? Oh yes...

Dad's here, and yes, it's as joyful an occasion as it's ever been, with him cussing me about bills and money, threatening to send me home, ripping into anybody who walks into my apartment, etc. etc. etc.

But what really gets to me is his undisputed knowledge of WHY I got sick, according to him, it's because I don't eat properly, because I don't wear socks on the cold floor, because I went out to a house warming one night - which means I go out EVERY night, of course - because I keep hanging around with all these "characters", because I drink cold stuff, and because I don't take my vitamens and go to sleep at 9pm.

Now, I could handle all this once, maybe twice a week, but not 10 times a day, the same thing, the repeating, the incessant badgering, and when I lose it and end up raising my voice, OF COURSE there's more cuss to be had. Argh, I so do love it when Dad comes to visit.

I need to get out of this house, Arthur, help, heeeeeelp!


9:09 AM | Jus | # | no comments

Monday, January 22

excuses, excuses, I've been sick as a... well I've been REALLY sick the past week, and I'm finally able to sleep more than 2 hours without waking up and walking around like a zombie, and almost crying for someone to make it stop hurting. Yes, things were bad.

Some really great news, my brother Vaughn is now a semi-celebrity, he got interviewed by adventuregamer.com (one of the three feature atricles) and a couple other sites have written about his fan-made game, his site gets more traffic than all of mine put together and I'm really proud of the damn clown. Hoozah!

In other news, Michelle, reaaallly funny, hardy har har, that last comment there, you'll get it for that, at some point in time ;) And yeah, if it wasn't for her calls I'd be twice as crappy and depressed, she really brightens my day, love ya sweetheart.


11:20 AM | Jus | # | no comments

Monday, January 15

So you people are probably wondering if Justin is still alive right cuz he hasn't posted in a while?

NO .... nope not me .... nahhh ..... not reallyyy .....

What .... no y'all aren't? Hmph mean people! heheh =P (You know that I'm just playing)!

Well anyway my poor baby is sick =( yes he has fever, headache, coughing, flu and the list goes on ..... and what sucks even more is that I'm not there to love him up and take care of him =( I hope that you get better soon honey! Hugs and kissesss ...

I did get to talk to him today and yesterday though which was great. Thank God for MSN! We get to talk for as long as we want to and it's totally free although it's not the greatest connection but it still beats a $400 phone bill every month!


11:59 PM | Michy | # | no comments

Sunday, January 14

I was right!

11:18 PM | Michy | # | no comments

Friday, January 12

Ya damn right cuz I woulda had cause to lay the SMACKDOWN on your candyass! hehehe =P BUT don't think that you got away though. You should be afraid .... be very afraid cuz I'm taking note of every time that you are bad and when I see you again, you're going to get it .... muhahahahaha!!!!

10:12 PM | Michy | # | no comments

Thursday, January 11

Eeks, I'm *almost* glad I'm in the states, so Michy can't hurt me.

I wrote you back baby, calm down.

What have I been up to? Well Salty came in today, and I had to pick his stupid ass up, grrrr, I still have to change the oil in the car and well... I won't bore you guys with more of my lame life. When I have something nice and prolific to write, maybe I'll post again...


1:53 AM | Jus | # | no comments

Wednesday, January 10

*pulling out hair and screamingggggg*

Somebody help meee please???? I've been seaching and searching and SEARCHINGGGG for information on the net for like almost 2 hours now for a project that I have to do and I haven't found ONE SINGLE PIECE OF USEFUL INFORMATIONNNN .... ahhhhhhhhh .... DAMMITT I'm going to hurt someone just nowww >oI

and JUSTINNNNNNNN still hasn't written me backkk! WHYYYY OH WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!


7:12 PM | Michy | # | no comments

Tuesday, January 9

I'm back. I still haven't fixed my background image, damn you people with extremely high resolutions.

Gosh It's been a while huh? Bet most of you thought I was dead, or worse, purposely ignoring everyone.

What to talk about, what to talk about... hmmm, I'm trying to think of something give me a chance... Darn, it's 9pm my time, that means it's 10 in Trinidad, thus I ain't calling Stac this late, I'm not too sure if her parents take kindly to that, or maybe that's my way of putting it off...

I called Anj before I left, and I was going to make some other calls, only, I ended up on the plane and the calls hadn't been made yet. I hadn't said goodbye to the most important and great friends anyone could ask for, and sorry's just ain't cutting it anymore, now are they.

BUT HEY, one step at a time here. Let's see what else's been floating around my head, Easy 9, the unfinished attempt at a group blog, still in limbo, and everyone got so caught up with their lives and the holidays not much posting's been going on, I'm no exception, no exception at all.

Leaving home this time was the by far, the hardest time I've had leaving since I've been bouncing between here and there. I mean, I never cry, the last time I did, well I was sick and it was an involuntary streaming of tears, so that doesn't count. But this time, I almost did, even though home doesn't feel like home anymore, having to leave one of the most important people again, and again, and again, is taking its toll. I have to hand it to her though, Michelle didn't cry, not at the airport anyway, and she did I pretty good job of holding up throughout the day. I can't describe how I did, because as soon as I set foot on that plane and sat down, I felt like a was in a little glass bubble, cut off from everyone and everything, an outsider with everyone staring in my direction, and then a ghost who nobody knew and I just felt so alone and, well even more alone. Very strange, It was a new feeling.

Passing references in my blog, my friends can't keep getting passing references and I can't expect that to be enough... I'll never forgot that. You know who you are. Words I won't soon forget, like a number of others, ah, well, um...

At a loss for words? Yup.

I don't want to feel depressed, and I don't want to end on any dred note, I'll try.

Haha, I just remembered one thing... Happy new year's guys, I'm looking forward to not being such a (censored) this year. I need some help, so here's the cry...

Okay when you can't think of any other coherent thought, that's a sign you should stop typing and hit the post button.

So said...


9:13 PM | Jus | # | no comments

Hey baby guess what today is! =P

So here I am again. Justin has gone and left me all alone! =P (j/k baby). Back to the old boring routine ... ugh this sucks. Classes started yesterday and I had a class from 11am - 1pm BUT I was stuck in the office ALLLL dayyy. That suckss even moreeee.

Ugh somebody shoot me ....


10:29 AM | Michy | # | no comments

Don't steal... blatantly.
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