the other night I pussied out.

she called, thrown into an uncomfortable situation, not wanting to deal with that then, I ran away. I ran away to my cozy land of meaningless chatter and nighttime tv. my land of selfish endeavors.

I ran away from someone I promised never to run away from. I ran away because it was convenient, because I didn't feel like dealing with her problems, my problems, our problems, just then.

running away. it's a trend. although that trend has little to do with the above. but all to do with the below...

if I've got it in my head that I want to do something, or just that this is how things should play out, anything that happens along in the way of that gets (not-so-politely) run over. I become an "uh, yeah, uh-huh" stuck record on phones, I abruptly end conversations, or ignore the distraction altogether. because I've got more important things to do, or more correctly, I've got a thing to do. and you better believe I'm going to do it, it's me time, not you time.

I'd lie if I said I was working on it.

Justin | 1:08 AM